Two simple strategies to stop comparing yourself with others and feeling sh*t about it.
There’s no such thing as “successful people”.
Yes, I have some bad news for you. We can’t continue labelling people as “successful” or even worse, as “losers”. Why? Because NOBODY can be successful at everything and nobody can be a “loser” (I hate that word!) at everything.
Whenever you think about someone that is successful, I’d like you to stop an analyse exactly what you have in mind. Is it the money they have in their bank account? Is it the new car they have bought? Is it the number of followers they have? What is it? And don’t get me wrong, I’m not against admiring people or having someone to look up. I’m all about finding mentors and people that inspire me. But the problem starts when we do unhealthy comparisons.
Yes, we tend to compare ourselves with others that are way ahead of our path. We see how SUCCESSFUL, AMAZING, INCREDIBLE they are and how shitty, stupid and banal we are. If you catch yourself doing the shitty comparison I want you to remember two things:
BE HERE NOW. Stop worrying about things you don’t have. Stop stressing about those decisions that you made in the past. Instead, feel grateful for what you have. It doesn’t matter how big, tiny, shiny it is, feel grateful for having a heart, for having access to this blog, for being alive, for literally everything that you have right now.
THIS ISN’T BLACK AND WHITE. There’s always a trade-off. ALWAYS. We just need to prioritise what we want. But before doing that. We need to stop this labelling practice because it isn’t causing any good. It isn’t helping anybody.
Have a look at this comparison table, and let me know what do you think.
Success in this area——————————————>frequently means relative failure in this area
Climbing the corporate ladder —————————> Family life
Family life ———————————————————> Climbing the corporate ladder
Philosophy/Poetry ————————————-——-> Making money
Being dependable & methodical —————-——-> Taking risks
Being kind and helpful —————————————> Crushing the competition
Zen Buddhist detachment ———————————-> Commercial property speculation
*comparison table taken from The School of Life.